Planning a Summer Vacation? Start here.

As a Kentucky divorce and custody lawyer, I can tell you that summer vacation with the kids is a big deal to virtually all of my clients who have kids. It's a time for fun, relaxation, and making memories. But when parents are parenting in separated homes, it can also become a source of stress and conflict if not handled properly. That's why planning early is absolutely essential, especially because summer plans can significantly impact the other parent's timesharing.

 

Think about it: summer is longer than any other school break. Kids often have camps, trips, and other activities planned. If one parent waits until the last minute to make plans, it can really throw a wrench into the other parent's schedule and create resentment. Imagine you've planned a family reunion for a specific week, only to find out a week before that your child's other parent has scheduled a two-week vacation during the same time. That's a recipe for conflict for even the most go-along-to-get-along parents.

 

So, why is early planning so important? Here's the breakdown:

• Fairness and Predictability: Early planning allows both parents to have a say in how the summer is structured. It creates a sense of fairness and predictability, which is crucial for co-parenting effectively. No one wants to feel like their summer plans are being dictated by the other parent.
• Minimizing Conflict: The earlier you start the conversation, the less likely it is to turn into a heated argument. Early planning allows for compromise and flexibility. If you can't agree on something, you have time to explore alternatives or even seek mediation.
• Child's Well-being: Kids benefit from knowing what to expect during the summer. Having a plan in place reduces their anxiety and allows them to look forward to the break. Summer should be a fun and relaxing time for them, not a source of stress.
• Legal Considerations: Your custody order likely already outlines how holidays and vacations are handled. Early planning ensures you're adhering to the order and avoiding potential legal issues down the road. If your order is vague, it is even more important to discuss plans and come to an agreement.

Now, how do you approach this conversation with your child's other parent? Here are my suggestions:

• Start Early and Communicate Openly: Don't wait until the school year is almost over. Begin discussing summer plans a few months in advance. Using email, a co-parenting app, or even a phone call (if communication is amicable) can be good starting points.
• Be Flexible and Willing to Compromise: Remember, this is about what's best for your child. Be open to suggestions from the other parent and be willing to compromise. Maybe you can't get every week or date you want, but perhaps you can work out a schedule that allows both of you quality time with your child.
• Focus on the Child's Interests: Consider your child's activities, interests, and friendships when making plans. Summer should be enjoyable for them.
• Put it in Writing: Once you've agreed on a summer schedule, put it in writing, and have both parents acknowledge its their agreement. This helps avoid misunderstandings later on. You can even incorporate it into a modified parenting order if necessary.
• Consider Mediation if Needed: If you and the other parent can't agree on summer plans, consider mediation. A neutral third party can help you find common ground and reach a mutually acceptable agreement. Just be mindful of the time necessary to select a mediator and schedule the mediation session.

Summer vacation is a time for kids to relax and have fun. By planning early and communicating effectively, you can make sure it's a positive experience for everyone involved, including you and your child's other parent. It’s about creating a win-win situation, and that starts with a collaborative approach.

 

Disclaimer:  This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice to any current or future client of Reed Law Group, PLC.